Man Rules - Trade Show Marketing Advice

man rules

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Relationship rules from a man's point of view. Please note... they are all numbered "1" on purpose.

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports... It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one! Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have NO idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We men do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really! Well, almost anything.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as football, basketball, or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know I have to sleep on the pull-out couch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

- by anonymous

[ enjoy more unrelated jokes and humor from the jokesters at Trade Show Marketing Advice ]

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Whether you are a man or a woman, we hope you were able to laugh at these "man rules". Here at tradeshowmarketingadvice.org, we like to laugh. But we also realize that while jokes are supposed to make you laugh, there is a time for laughing, and a time to be serious, and when it comes the success of your business, it's the time to be serious. That's why we take tradeshow marketing seriously, and we believe you should also. If you are planning on doing any trade show marketing in the future, we hope that you will remember or website and that you'll remember our advice on tradeshow giveaway ideas, tradeshow booth ideas, and tradeshow display ideas. Our unrelated humor section is supposed to be funny and make you laugh, but our main focus is making you a tradeshow success, and when it comes to that, we are serious!